Is She The ONE?

BLING, BLING

You may find this easy or you may have some serious reservations.  It doesn’t matter.  This is essential.  This will in no way reflect your feelings of worth about her but she may not see it that way.  This will reveal how much she appreciates you and your efforts to make her happy.  It may cost a little but it could save you a lot.

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The old adage, diamonds are a girl’s best friend, is true.  I (personally) don’t know of any woman that will turn down a diamond.  Diamonds may not be every woman’s favorite because there are tons of beautiful stones in an array of colors on the market.  I do not doubt that lovers of other gemstones exist, I just don’t know any.  Your girl may be this anomaly but if you present her with a diamond, I doubt very seriously that she will make you take it back.

However, this is about something much smaller than a diamond.  Outside of diamonds, women can be very particular about jewelry.  Some women only want to wear gold while others wear platinum or silver and some load up on costume (fake) jewelry.

The options are limitless and your observations of her taste in jewelry speak volumes about how well you know her.  Close your eyes and imagine her favorite piece of jewelry.  If you cannot do so, you may need to spend a few days observing her and what she likes to wear.

One night I received a phone call from Courtney.  She sounded concerned so I asked what was up.  She said that Rod had just come home and brought her a gold necklace with a “C” charm on it.  I was confused.  What was the problem?  She said, “He must be up to something.  He never just buys me jewelry like this.”

I tried to explain that maybe he was just doing something nice.  She would not hear of it.  On top of all of that, she explained that she never wears gold and could not believe that he didn’t know that.

I felt sorry for both of them.  Sorry, that Courtney could not appreciate Rod trying to be spontaneous and do something nice and sorry that Rod didn’t know enough about Courtney to know that she doesn’t wear gold.

A situation that could have been extremely romantic and endearing became a wedge in their relationship because she obviously didn’t trust him and he didn’t know her very well.

Prior to that, Rod had confided that he thought Courtney was the ONE.  This situation opened his eyes and he began to see some other personality issues that helped him to realize that they were not as compatible as he once thought.  He said that he wanted someone who could appreciate him and his small love offerings.

To Do:

Buy her a piece of jewelry – just because, no holiday, no special occasion.  Aim for a bracelet, earrings or a necklace – nothing extravagant.  Don’t try to make it into something special.  Give it to her as a ‘just because’ gift.

If you have a hard time picking out something that you think she will like then you really don’t know her very well.  If you are prepared to marry her, you should know a great deal about her – including her taste in jewelry.

To avoid finding yourself in Rod’s position, it may be helpful to observe her jewelry collection for a couple of days.  If you see chunky pieces, it may not be a good idea to go with something fragile whereas if she wears lots of different colors, just ask her favorite color as a good starting point.

This will also provide insight into her ability to appreciate the two months’ salary (yes, two months is customary) that you will be spending on her engagement ring.  Look at this like a trial purchase.

Decisions…

Gold digger – her eyes will instantly begin to appraise the value of your gift.  She won’t hesitate to let you know whether you did a good job.  Just beware that she may begin to expect more ‘just because’ gifts.

Yes, your feelings should be hurt if she wants to exchange it for something else or return it and get the money.  This is about the thought and her ability to appreciate your efforts.

Drama queen – she will find something wrong with gift even if deep down she really loves it.  Her ability to find satisfaction in the small things in life could be a sign of her inability to find happiness in life period.  You might want to reflect on her ability to be happy in general.  Is this a rare mood for her or is she always displeased with something?

THE ONE – she will be sincerely impressed with your efforts and will treasure your gift.  She will probably want to wear it immediately and may not take it off for several days.  The look on her face may even be your incentive to give her more ‘just because’ gifts.

You want to know that no matter how small or how great your offering is, it will be appreciated.

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