When I first began reading this book, I honestly didn’t know what to expect.
I had just interviewed Larie on The LaKesha Womack Show to discuss her work as a Book Reviewer with Breathe Again Magazine and we briefly touched on her work as a published author.
The book arrived on the Saturday before Easter. I was in the middle of baking cupcakes for the Easter Egg Hunt and decided to thumb through it while I waited. I started somewhere in the middle just to get an idea of what the book was all about. I found myself in the midst of a story that Larie was recalling about a high school boyfriend, family drama that ensued and her typical teenage girl reaction. After about three pages, I had to start over from the beginning.
Within hours of reading page after page (and almost burning a batch of the cupcakes), I found myself recounting painful childhood memories that I thought I had gotten past. I remembered being the promiscuous girl in high school that boys considered easy and my not understanding why I tolerated this abusive behavior yet not having the courage to say no. I remembered running away from my situation, much like Larie did. Although she only stayed away a few days, I chose to attend a boarding school then college and didn’t return home for a significant amount of time for almost twelve years.
In “My Heart Speaks… Of Boys and A Girl”, Larie displays an emotional honesty about the effects of sexual abuse in a young woman’s life including her struggle to have a normal relationship and to accept love. I often say that what children experience during childhood defines their normal. When their bodies are abused and their sexuality exposed, they don’t understand how not to continue accepting the abuse and remaining uncovered. When it seems that all boys and men want from you is sex and you are desperately seeking some semblance of love from an absent paternal figure, it is only natural that you give in with hopes that the next one will be the one who finally fulfills you.
I recommend this book to any woman or young girl who has ever experienced sexual abuse but could not find the voice to speak about it. There are so many young girls and grown women who continue to spread their legs for men undeserving of that sacred sharing space yet they don’t even understand the cycle of abuse forming their warped reality. This book may be the starting point for that female to acknowledge her brokeness and begin to heal.