Silence isn’t always golden

I’ m not the type of person that likes to share my problems with others.  It may seem strange considering I have such an open network.  When I start to go through something, I have a tendency to shut down and retreat.

At one point, I thought my silence was golden.  I thought that people would appreciate me keeping my problems to myself.  Recently, I have learned through friends and others around me that sometimes my silence is more painful than me shouting my problems from the rooftops.  There are some people who actually care to know how I am doing and what is wrong with me.

Old habits are hard to break.  Sometimes I want to open up but after years of being self-sufficient, not having anyone to rely on and surviving quite well; I can’t just change and become the person that others want me to be. When faced with fight or flight… I soar like an eagle.

If you feel as though you have been hurt by my silence and/or distance then I sincerely apologize.  I love to give advice and help others to not make the same mistakes that I’ve made in life but please remember… I am on a journey also.  I hit bumps in the road, get sidetracked and often crash and burn.  Parts of my voyage are more like public transportation than a private car service but the fact remains, I have lived in this mode of transportation for many, many moons.

Enjoy the ride and don’t take my setbacks too personally.

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4 thoughts on “Silence isn’t always golden

  1. steve says:

    Interesting, heartfelt post, but non-specific apologies are no apologies at all. Reach out specifically to those who deserve your apology.

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  2. Lakesha I am the same way. I had to be independent at a very young age, so all I know is relying on myself to solve my problems. Its very hard to change when you’re so used to doing things one way. I struggle with letting go of control because I don’t trust anyone else to get whatever I need done. This post really hit home with me, when you said fight or flight, I soar like an eagle…if that’s not me. I’m working on it though, its hard but I’m trying!

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  3. SPEAK ON IT…

    It’s your journey only you can write your passage. Absolutely, silence isn’t golden & can do more hurt than harm. I just had this conversation with someone last night. People shouldn’t take words so literally the message could as well be directed for/to someone who is living or passed on. True Forgiveness is a Toxic Release, when you are ready to share your hurts, disappointments, or mis-understandings its your journey; do on your time.

    The bottom line is you have express your thoughts, feelings regardless if the apology is accepted or not. You have release the toxins and placed it in gods hands.

    We want to believe/trust that those we allow in our lives have our best interest at heart. That is not always the case. There are seasons in life sometimes friends, associates and love ones have peaked their season in your life. It doesn’t mean you love, care for them any less-you just care,love yourself a whole lot more.

    As usual what you have shared will reach someone, if they make a comment or not.

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  4. Are you reading my mind or tapping my phone line because I think someone I know wants me to change. I keep telling them that this is me and if they don’t like it they can keep walking.

    Peace, Love and Chocolate
    Tiffany

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