He’s just not that into ME?? Impossible!

This is a flashback story…

A couple of years ago, I was dating a guy and I was head over heels for him.  I knew this because I offered to help him clean his apartment.  Anyone who knows me, knows that I believe wholeheartedly in the power of a cleaning service.  Anyway, despite my desire to be his Ms. Mary Poppins, we were having some problems.  I was talking to a friend about these problems and I guess I started to wear out my welcome on the subject because one day I came home and there was a package from Amazon.com on my doorstep.  I was a little perplexed because I didn’t remember ordering anyone off-line but sure enough my correct name and address were on the package.  I go inside and start to relax, open my package and low and behold, my friend sent me a copy of the book, “He’s just not that into you.”

I consider myself a dime, a five-star chick, a good catch and all of the other things that can be said for Ms. Independent so I could not understand why this dude wasn’t in to me.  Needless to say, the relationship ended because I wasn’t about to be cooking and cleaning for someone that wasn’t feeling me but it stuck in my head that this dude just wasn’t in to me.  I’m sure that it shouldn’t matter but I have always wanted to ask him, what was it?  When we broke up, he said that it was because he was finishing business school and didn’t want to complicate his life by having to take me into consideration when deciding what to do next but even that felt like crap. 

Earlier this week in Success Secret #19, I talked about being able to let go.  This is one of those situations where it is very beneficial to know how to let go.  A lot of times we stay in relationships that we know we shouldn’t be in because our ego won’t let us leave.  We can’t imagine that this other person is so blind that they can’t see how perfect we are and how we will just complete their life.  Even though, in the back of our minds we are well aware of the problems that exist and how imperfect we are for each.  We just don’t want to feel like we “failed” at the relationship so we work overtime trying to make it work. 

I hate to tell you this but sometimes you have to know when to hold ’em and when to fold ’em.  Don’t stick around in a relationship that satisfies your ego more than your emotions.  If (s)he just isn’t that in to you and treat you as such, it’s probably time to read the writing on the wall and move on…


9 thoughts on “He’s just not that into ME?? Impossible!

  1. swissknifev says:

    Hi LaKesha ! That guy had a dumb way of breaking a relationship. He could have done it with more sensitivity.Actually you look like a fine woman. That guy was stupid. He has lost a good friend I suppose.


  2. Kristena says:

    Had a relationship like that he was not that into me but what I had to offer but I stayed and I even brought him jordan for his b’day. For those who know me know I’m not that giving. I stayed not because of love,but because of who he was on campus but after a while I left him for someone who was into me as a person and not what I had to offer. When u are young u take a lot stuff that now as mature adults u wouldn’t let last 10 minutes in current situation.


  3. Kristena says:

    Don’t no if my original post came throught, so I just want to say that when you are young u will allow a lot of thing to change u or do thing you usually wouldn’t but as mature adults u apply standards and rule to your daily life and you don’t change them for anyone! Hopefully u learn from past experiences and move forward


  4. swissknifev says:

    You’re right. As you mature experiences change you. Sometimes they free you, sometimes they block.Life’s tough ma’am…


  5. swissknifev says:

    Sometimes you have to be ruthless with relationships. It’s like a lock and key. Lock the door, throw the key into the sea so that you’ll never be tempted to go back again. I usually point out the meanest thing in the person’s life before I chop a relationship like a lab. that way the person never thinks of me again. Ruthless amputation. A new and better relationship forms. If that goes bad – the sickle once again. So be an island and be in control to get rid of people who may potentially hurt you. You must be ready to eliminate them mentally.


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