Women, we were set up…

I told one of my girl friends the other day that I thought women were set up.  I am sure you are probably just as curious as she was to find out what I am talking about.  As I explained my theory, it really made sense to her. 

Living happily ever after

As little girls, we watched these fairy tales that told us Prince Charming was on his way, on his white horse to rescue us from the drudgery of real life, to whisk us off to a palace and to live happily ever after.  Some of you may not have fallen for that but there are others still waiting for the dream to be realized.  Even if it wasn’t manifested as a result of a fairy tale, some of you did envision having a perfect body; a wonderful husband; cute and obedient children; an immaculate house; a luxury car; a successful career; involvement in a few social organizations and I am sure the list continues with responsibilities to your friends, family members and possibly co-workers.

Are you starting to see the set up?  How is it possible for any of us to attain all of that?  If you have checked off even half of those items on your list, you should consider yourself blessed because most of us are struggling to nail down two or three.  Part of my young and fabulous lifestyle is realizing that some of those things on that list are expectations that society has for me but they are not that important to me.

As I approached my 30’s, I didn’t see any knights in shining armour rushing my way so I decided to make some tough decisions about how I would take charge of my life and move forward.  That is not to say, that I don’t still have the fantasy in my head but my reality is that I would rather be great at a few things, like being a mother and having a successful career, than stressing myself out trying to be everything to everyone and chasing the cheese. 

This really should be a success secret but I am going to go ahead and spill it.  Having it all doesn’t mean having everything on that list.  It means figuring out what is important to you, what are your priorities, and going for it. If you will notice, the happiest people that you know don’t have all of those things but they have a few and choose to focus on what is good in their life instead of searching for what may be missing.

Guess what?  Guys, you were set up too! Come back next Thursday to find out how…


5 thoughts on “Women, we were set up…

  1. Kristena says:

    Totally agree with u. As women we are set up to believe one thing but when u get in the real world its totally opposite of what we have read and seen on television. And to be honest with u at one point in time I felt I had been cheated out all the things that’s suppose to make u happy until I re-evaluate self and realize I had what I need and I could be happy with that and build. I don’t feel that I have settle for less because I continue to build on what I havw to make it the best and then some


  2. Jokeyra says:


    Love this….I think the dream may come, for some, from the lifestyle that you lived as a child. We may focus alot of time on trying to make life better than what we were used to. With that being said, we set high expectations and we think that we need all of these things to be happy not realizing that happiness comes from within and has nothing to do with the things we have been made to believe brings happiness. Since having my baby I have found that whatever makes him happy makes me happy. Great blog….Keep it coming.


  3. Yeah, it’s true…with age comes wisdom! I think we place too much emphasis on what others want for us that many of us haven’t a clue to what we really want for ourselves, when we’re asked the question. I think it is about self-reflection and we really should encourage it from an early age. I remember having teachers encouraging me to go to law school or be a Dr., b/c they wanted me to be “Successful”. But they didn’t consider, if I was happy doing what I was truly passionate about, which I’m realizing now is “The Arts”, I could have been doing it much sooner instead of later in life…


  4. Bruce Martin says:

    Not to sound “blunt” but Why is 70% of blackmen or single? Is it a disease? As a blackman, I have an idea on why, but it may not hold water.


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